Economic Stimulus payment.

Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment.



This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by
Using a Q & A format:


Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.


Q.. Where will the government get this money ?

A. From taxpayers.


Q.. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

A. Only a smidgen of it.


Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a
High-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.


Q.. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up.


Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:




* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will
Go to China or Sri Lanka .


* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the
Arabs.


* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or
China.



* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,
Honduras and Guatemala.



* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .




* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan.



* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go
To management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.


Instead, keep the money in America by:


1) Spending it at yard sales, or

2) Going to ball games, or

3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

4) Beer or

5) Tattoos.


(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )



Conclusion:

Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard Sale and drink beer all day !


No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.





Doug...

I hope this was just a copy and paste...

I feel the (If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea) IS WRONG...

I agree Adam, 100%. They're just meant as jokes. I wouldn't buy ANY foreign car, I don't care if it gets 100mpg. Though alot of them are built in America now, the money still supports foreign companies.









Doug...

After the labor, and other bills are paid, the rest goes to Japan, or where ever, toyota is at least taking a hit.

ThndrChkn wrote:Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard Sale and drink beer all day !

sounds like fun.

Mines going to Lem, I needs more parts for my motor!!!

Great!! LMAO

Good one Doug!

Bill

torkair wrote:Mines going to Lem, I needs more parts for my motor!!!

Lem do you take gov't checks?

With the stimulus payment they want us to travel USA and spend nites at motel owned by mideast people who are buying up all motels with their goverment money or with the money they get from our tax payment to government, then if thats not enough they want us to buy liquor from them to, OH<OH<OH don't forget to stop at your quick stop stores( to get drink or smokes)[b]. All funded by GOVERNMENT--not taxes paid for profit gain for FIVE years--BULL CRAP we can't get those loans--so why them ? ? When i stop a store and its run by "Sand Niggers" i don't buy nothing i leave . I find ones that USA still have an spend my buck with them . Its like i have gas station that is 4 miles out my way so i drive it so i don't spend a "DIME" to support them. Not now but later years they will be in our government to run USA. We need to quit letting these F__K heads from coming to our country to live. Something that would be FUNNY make them go in Army for four years and fight against their own. Make them EARN their way , not given to them. They come from where the world is screwed up , an bring their crap here. Our law makers are letting things get to far out of hand. Thats the "STIMULUS PAYMENT"

schmitty wrote:

torkair wrote:Mines going to Lem, I needs more parts for my motor!!!

Lem do you take gov't checks?

MMMM, all this has already happened.